Lolita Wolf's Predictions & Predilections

My new ex-girlfriend

August 4th, 2008 · No Comments

One of the concepts I teach in some of my classes is that people are too quick to slap a label on a relationship. I think many people are goal-oriented and eager to define what role a person should play in their lives. Often they decide that someone they recently hit it off with would be a good match for what they are looking for. This decision is made before they really get to know each other. There is a rush to bestow the title of Master or declare someone a mentor or a slave or a boyfriend or whatever. Many times disappointment ensues when the other person does not live up to the expectations associated with the role that they have been squeezed into.

Personally, I am extremely slow to label a relationship. Some of my friends tease me because I am so slow. But what’s the rush? I am happy taking it slow feeling no pressure and not pressuring the other person. I don’t load on a bunch of expectations. It is what it is. That is not to say that I don’t expect certain basic things like honesty, respect and such. But beyond that, I allow a relationship to meander and grow organically.

On the flip side, I am also slow to break up. I am loyal and patient. I am willing to wait. And perhaps I wait too long sometimes. My relationship with my girlfriend had evolved and she was not living up to the expectations of what being a “girlfriend” meant to me. We went on for a long time with the status quo and it made me unhappy. I finally told her that calling her my girlfriend was phony and we both agreed that we would take away the label of girlfriend. I told her that I wasn’t sure what to call her now, but decided that she would just be my “ex-girlfriend.” We laughed about that, but now the expectations are removed and there’s no tension any more. We remain friends and we have plans to go on vacation with two other friends in December.

→ No CommentsTags: Relationships

Hee hee hee, boo boo boo, hah hah hah

August 1st, 2008 · 1 Comment

I love Cheetos! Especially the puffy kind.

Oooh! A spanking on the television show, Weeds.

I want to go to the Whitney to see Robert Mapplethorpe’s polaroids.

I’m anti-marriage and anti-romance. Mostly. But I thought this was really cool.

A music video from Athens Boys Choir – fer real tho, I got a dildo.

→ 1 CommentTags: Links and Stuff

I love a chain link fence

August 1st, 2008 · No Comments

Tober Brandt and Chet Walker on BoundGods.com

Van Darkholme’s new site is now live. Hot stuff!

→ No CommentsTags: BDSM · Bondage

My IML 2008 Trip – Part 13

August 1st, 2008 · No Comments

International Mr. Leather 2008: Gary Iriza, Mr. Palm Springs Leather 2008
1st Runner-up: Bob Firth-Tessier, M. Cuir Montreal 2008
2nd Runner-up: Scott Melton, Mr. Ramrod 2007
International Mr. Bootblack 2008: Bootdog, of the Alameda County Leather Corps

The contest is the centerpiece of IML weekend, but I’d rather tell you a story from afterwards. Thor lured us up to his room with promises of sweet things like chocolate-covered macaroons, biscotti and dark chocolate. So, it was Thor, Bad Faggot, son chris, Boymeat, Tim, AJ and me sitting around enjoying. And in walk these two guys. Apparently we did not close the door all the way.

Now, when you go to an event like IML and you leave your door ajar, it is a signal, an invitation to enter. And this is always an invitation for sex of some sort. When you enter a room like that, you never know exactly what you may find. It could be a single guy waiting tied up with some lube at his side waiting to be fucked, a bunch of guys having an orgy, or something. You just never know.

Anyway, these two guys walk in and see this group sitting around eating sweets. This was not at all what they expected to find. We were quite friendly to them and shared the chocolate. They stayed a little while enjoying with us and then Thor told them that there were Germans down the hall. So they said their thanks and their goodbyes and went off to find more adventures.

→ No CommentsTags: Event Reviews

Find Lolita – August 2008 and beyond

August 1st, 2008 · No Comments

Sabrina Sweet, Cj and Steve Holmes on sexandsubmission

August 2 – Philadelphia, PA
Black Phoenix

August 15-17 – Edison, NJ
Floating World: teaching Hot Wax to the Max, The Greedy Pig Loves Threesomes, and That Will Shut ‘Em Up!

August 29 – NYC
TES-TNG: teaching “It’s Amazing What You Can Find”

September 10-15 – Maryland
Dark Odyssey Summer Camp: teaching Kidz Rule, Sensory Deprivation & Control, Caning: from Ah! to Zowie!!!, and Look Ma: No Rope!

September 19-21 – Chicago, IL
Kinky Kollege: teaching Caning: from Ah!” to “Zowie!!! and Stuff Yer Hole

September 26-28 – San Jose, CA
Folsom Fringe: teaching How To Play With Needles plus one other

October 4 – NYC
Sex Positive Journalism Awards: I am emceeing

Oct 31-Nov 3 – Washington DC
Black Rose: teaching: CBT In A Nutshell, King Tut’s Kink: Mummification! and Contracts for Play or Serious Commitment

February 27 – March 1 – Dallas, TX
South Plains Leatherfest: teaching Decorative Piercing, Co-Topping and Metal Bondage

April 9-12 – Atlanta, GA
Frolicon: teaching three classes TBA

→ No CommentsTags: Find Lolita

Thor’s Birthday

August 1st, 2008 · No Comments

Thors Birthday

On Thursday night a group of us celebrated Thor’s birthday. We went to Chelsea Cinemas to see The Ritz, which was very funny. Thor brought caramel popcorn and candy to share. Ray won a raffle prize.

Afterwards we went to Moonstruck. Thor likes the food and the service there plus we could get a big table. Thor poured his chocolate milkshake into the beer stein that Scott and Ollie gave him. It is imprinted with the the Thorbrau name and logo. And we had cake!

Happy Birthday, Thor! I’m glad that I could help celebrate.

→ No CommentsTags: Relationships

NYC Weekly Leather Dates July 31-August 6

July 31st, 2008 · No Comments

Maria Bellucci and Kurt Lockwood on Fucked and Bound

Thursday, July 31

Friday, August 1
NYC Munch
DSF: “ Wax Play” w/ Sire Blue
One Taste: Kinky Carnival!

Saturday, August 2
TES-TNG: “New York Renaissance Faire Excursion”

Sunday, August 3
MAsT: Metro NY Meeting: “M/s, Not Just For Couples. Exploring M/s as a Single, Triad and Beyond!”

Monday, August 4

Tuesday, August 5
TES: “Ten Minute Tales… It’s Back!”
CineKink: Tawdry Summer Tryst

Wednesday, August 6
TES: Singles Group: “Mummification” with Master George and Submissive Ophelia
Pleasure Salon

→ No CommentsTags: NYC Weekly Leather Dates

The Tea Party

July 30th, 2008 · 33 Comments

Martyn likes little girls and he likes to treat them special. The other day he planned a tea party for me and Selina. The table was set with pretty dishes and teacups. I was the guest of honor and got to sit in the Queen chair and wear a tiara. He had gathered all the stuffed animals so that they could be there, too. The big bears sat on the couch. The Barbie dolls were not invited. I don’t think they do tea. I think they prefer nightclubs. I prefer to hang out with the bears and everybody else anyway.

After we ate and drank, Martyn got out some rope. The plan was to tie up Selina’s breasts. But things don’t always turn out the way we plan. Selina was on the bed in a very, very short skirt and her ass was looking really good. I took that hunk of rope and hit her on the ass with it. She moaned. That’s how you can tell when a girl likes it. So, I hit her again and she moaned some more. She really liked the thud of the rope.

Martyn kept handing me more spanking toys and Selina kept moaning, so it’s not really my fault that I kept spanking her ass. Martyn even helped with the spanking and we spanked her pussy, too. She liked that a lot. And then Selina’s shirt became unbuttoned. I don’t remember how that happened but the next thing you know there were her big breasts. She has big nipples and Martyn and I each took one. She moaned some more because she really likes having her nipples stimulated.

Now, here is the embarrassing part of the story. We all fell asleep on the bed. That’s right! Somehow in the middle of this hot BDSM sex threesome, we all fell asleep. That was not supposed to happen. It did feel good to nap with good friends in the afternoon and sleep close together. But really, that was not the plan.

→ 33 CommentsTags: Scene Report · Spanking

Larry Townsend

July 30th, 2008 · 9 Comments

Larry Townsend

Obituary courtesy Jack Fritscher

Larry Townsend
“Legendary”
27 October 1930 – 29 July 2008

Spill a drop for lost brothers…

“Larry Townsend was the pseudonymous author of dozens of books including Run Little Leather Boy (1970) and The Leatherman’s Handbook (1972) at pioneer erotic presses such as Greenleaf Classics and the Other Traveler imprint of Olympia Press. Growing up as a teenager of Swiss-German extraction in Los Angeles a few houses from Noel Coward and Irene Dunne, he ate cookies with his neighbor Laura Hope Crews who was Aunt Pittypat in Gone with the Wind. He attended the prestigious Peddie School, and was stationed as Staff Sergeant in charge of NCOIC Operations of Air Intelligence Squadrons for nearly five years with the US Air Force in Germany (1950-1954). Completing his tour of duty, he entered into the 1950s underground of the LA leather scene where he and Montgomery Clift shared a lover. With his degree in industrial psychology from UCLA (1957), he worked in the private sector and as a probation officer with the Forestry Service. He began his pioneering activism in the politics of gay liberation in the early 1960s. In 1972, as president of the ‘Homophile Effort for Legal Protection’ which had been founded in 1969 to defend gays during and after arrests, he led a group in founding the H.E.L.P. Newsletter, the forebear of Drummer (1975). As a writer and photographer, he was an essential eyewitness of the drama and salon around Drummer in which his novels were often excerpted. His signature “Leather Notebook” column appeared in Drummer for twelve years beginning in 1980, and continued in Honcho to Spring 2008. His last novel, TimeMasters, was published April 2008.” This new thumbnail biography, approved and updated by Larry Townsend, is reprinted from the leather-heritage book Gay San Francisco: Eyewitness Drummer which, published June 20, 2008, also includes Larry’s “Eyewitness Introduction,” his last published writing.

→ 9 CommentsTags: Books

Sugasm #142

July 30th, 2008 · No Comments

Charlotte Vale and Billy on thetrainingofo.com

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #143? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week’s Picks
Interludes – part 3
“He winds the rope around his hands, smoothing the kinks, and I stand there, breathing a little faster, conscious of all those eyes upon me.”

Hurts So Good
“I want you to wear the badges of sweet distress for days.”

Shower fantasy
“You don’t want to admit it, but you want me.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sugar Bank

Editor’s Choice
Why I haven’t blogged about the Mosley case

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

BDSM & Fetish
A bit of roleplay …
Bound, Pinched and Spanked
Club Visit, Part 1
The Coolest Bondage Fetish Edgeplay Picture Ever Taken
24/7 – Día Internacional del BDSM
Discoveries of the Domina
First Encounter: an unlikely meeting
Girls Boarding School updates. Hard Punishment
The Hottest Gas Mask Fetish Erotica I’ve Ever Read By Tina Peitsche
Leather Retreat 2008 – My Dolly
Masochism
Mr. Kink Plays With Thursday’s Child
My inner pain slut makes an appearance
Play time at Jules & Malycia’s
The Seduction of Daddy’s baby
Spanking Galleries: Punishment for pretty girl