Lolita Wolf's Predictions & Predilections

As a BDSM Sex Educator and Author, I don't just talk about it. I do it! And then I write about it.

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Question #1

March 5th, 2009 · No Comments

Okay, I’ll bite: Can you end up suffering from the Stockholm Syndrome when you have an intense monthly BDSM session with the same Pro Domme for years? Not about me, of course, but a friend.

First, take a look at the definition of Stockholm Syndrome.  Stockholm Syndrome is a defense mechanism that allows a victim to survive a great amount of physical and/or emotional abuse.  Once a victim is released, they usually condemn the people who did this to them.

So, I do not think the term Stockholm Syndrome would apply.  Often clients develop a deep loyalty to a Pro Domme and the relationship can be mutually very rewarding.  However, in an extreme case, a client could be taken advantage of or even be brainwashed by someone who does not have their best interests in mind.  An example would be a recent case that I heard of: a financial domination scenario where the client never even met the Domme, received very little attention from her and was sending so much money to her that he went into financial ruin.

How are these monthly BDSM sessions affecting your friend?  If he enjoys them or feels empowered by them, then don’t worry.  But if these sessions “cause him a significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning,” then he’s got a problem and should see a therapist.

March is question month.  You can ask your question here.

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