LOLITA’S PREDICTIONS & PREDILECTIONS
June 25, 2003
Volume 9, Number 24
© Copyright 2003 by Lolita Wolf
Material may not be reproduced in whole or in part
without prior written consent of the copyright holder.
The views expressed herein are exclusively those of the
author and do not represent the views of any other
person or any organization with which the author may
QUOTATION OF THE WEEK
“Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.”
– Benjamin Franklin
RAIN – BLECH!
I had a great weekend in spite of the rain. Naught
Nancy was in town and did a great workshop at LSM on
Shaving. I am now inspired to buy a straight edge razor.
Neptune thinks I should try to shave a balloon first, but
Nancy said that was a waste and she never did that.
Be afraid, Neptune! The next day, in spite of the rain,
we went motorcycling around Red Hook with Nancy.
Neptune has his license but is still a beginner and will
be until he gets his own bike. We got very wet but
stripped off our clothes and threw them in the dryer.
The rain cleared up for the first half of Folsom but it all
shut down early. I packed up a soggy NCSF outreach
table and headed out to Chinese.
SOME THOUGHTS ON THE POLITICS & ETHICS OF OUTING
By John Weis
I was a little surprised at the recent outrage at the
P&P for revealing the dirty little secrets of a certain
investigative reporter, and toward me for having the
audacity to suggest wider distribution of that account
in a post to sm-act. “An act of terrorism!” declared one
pseudonymous poster. I feel no vested interest in
outing said reporter, but I am comfortable if others do,
without us going to red alert as a community.
“Outing,” a term coined by Time Magazine in late 1989,
originally meant declaring closeted public figures to be
gay or lesbian, usually for some political purpose.
Hypocrisy was always the rationale for outing.
Outing has always been controversial, and by definition,
non-consensual. It played an important role in the
guerilla politics of the early 1990s and was aimed mostly
towards closeted elected officials who voted against AIDS
funding and/or LGBT initiatives by day, while carousing
gay bars by night.
Nowadays, the expression has been watered-down
and mainstreamed to mean revealing just about anything
without the written consent of the subject – what simply
used to be called gossip. (i.e. She was outed as a Ben
and Jerry’s addict.)
I don’t believe in the politics of personal destruction. I
don’t think the private should become public as a matter
of anger, spite, or revenge. But if you’re a public figure
who denounces, derides, or votes against that which you
gladly participate in privately, I will support the exposure
of your hypocrisy. Period.
Is it “nice”? Of course not, but this isn’t about being
nice. This is about the real world of “fuck with me, and
I’ll fuck with you” and I think there are plenty of
circumstances that arise to that threshold. But for me
the math is simple: public figure + hypocrisy = candidate
Maybe I’m more comfortable with the idea then some
because as a gay man I have had more opportunities to
be outraged at self-righteous, duplicitous hypocrites.
Maybe I delight in a little Schadenfreude. Maybe it’s
simply the right thing to do.
I don’t believe there will ever be consensus on the issue.
Regardless, outing – whether it’s the revelation that
morals czar Bill Bennett is a degenerate gambler or that
monogamy maven Andrew Sullivan is trolling for group
sex on the Internet – is here to stay.
For those interested in reading more about “outing,”
I highly recommend “Contested Closets: the Politics
and Ethics of Outing”, by University of Pennsylvania
Professor Larry P. Gross.
**** John Weis is a past president and past chairman
of Gay Male S/M Activists. He’s the founder and chairman
emeritus of the Leather Leadership Conference, he serves
on the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom Foundation
board, and in April 2002 he was appointed to represent
the interests of the 87,479 residents of Manhattan’s
Westside, from 14th Street to 60th Street, as a member
of Community Board 4. ****
NCSF APPLAUDS US SUPREME COURT RULING ON TEXAS
The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom applauds the
U.S. Supreme Court ruling striking down the Texas
sodomy law. The justices voted 6-3 to overturn their
1986 decision on Bowers v Hardwick (GA), stating that
the sodomy law is an unconstitutional invasion of privacy
and that by singling out gay people, it violates the
Constitution’s guarantee of equal protection under the
NCSF believes, as the court held today, that state
sodomy laws violate the fundamental privacy rights of
adults in the U.S. These intrusive sodomy laws regulate
the right of consenting adults to engage in sexual
activities such as oral and anal sex as well as playing
with sex toys in their bedroom or in private venues such
as swing clubs or SM playspaces. Our core constituencies
require the right to privacy and equal protection in order
to be free of discrimination, and because consenting
adults have the fundamental right to express their
private sexuality without government interference.
“The state cannot demean their existence or control
their destiny by making their private sexual conduct a
crime,” Justice Kennedy wrote, according to a report from
The Associated Press.
Of the 13 states with sodomy laws, four — Texas,
Kansas, Oklahoma and Missouri — prohibit oral and anal
sex between same-sex couples. The other nine ban
consensual sodomy for everyone: Alabama, Florida, Idaho,
Louisiana, Mississippi, North Carolina, South Carolina,
Utah and Virginia. Thursday’s ruling apparently invalidates
those laws as well.
“This ruling is a major victory for us all,” stated Eden
Sarfaty, Executive Director of NCSF. “State sodomy laws,
which generally define the act of sodomy as “deviant” sex,
have been on the books of every state as recently as 1960.
Such laws have a significant impact on society in general by
attempting to legislate morality. The U.S. Supreme Court
has sent a strong message today that government has no
right to intrude into our private sexual lives.”
EDEN SAFARTY NAMED EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF NCSF
The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) has
named Eden Sarfaty as Executive Director. Sarfaty, a
Washington, DC attorney, is an expert in the area of
legislative and administrative law, with experience in the
management of national associations, lobbying at all
levels of state and federal government, and criminal
defense. He will take the helm from Leigha Fleming,
acting Executive Director, on July 1st, 2003.
“As Executive Director, I look forward to supporting
NCSF’s grassroots mission of advocacy for the
SM-leather-fetish, swing and polyamory communities,”
Sarfaty said. “Our challenges will be to encourage the
energy and focus the resources of our communities to
dispel myths, help get reliable and useful information to
people who need or want it, and to foster the tolerance
and respect that Americans of all kinds so rightly value.”
“Eden is a proven leader and manager with experience
in running national organizations,” stated Vivienne
Kramer, Chairperson of NCSF. “These are qualities that
NCSF needs at this period in our growth. The Board of
Directors’ Search Committee conducted an objective
screening process and interviewed a diverse group of
strong candidates who were eager to work with NCSF.
We chose Eden because of his outstanding skills,
enthusiasm and dedication to fighting for the sexual
freedom of consenting adults.”
NCSF thanks Judy Guerin and Richard Cunningham for
their generous gift to fund the salary of NCSF’s new
executive director for the following six months. With this
donation, Guerin, former Executive Director for NCSF
(1999-2002), continues to demonstrate her long-standing
commitment to NCSF and the alternative sexuality
communities. “Without Judy’s assistance, we would not be
where we are today,” said Kramer.
“I’m delighted that Eden Sarfaty will be coming on
board!” stated Leigha Fleming. “While I’ve been pleased
that I could serve as Interim Executive Director, I’m even
more pleased that I’ll now be able to return my full
attention and focus to the development of NCSF’s
constituency services. We have new programs ready for
release and will be doing national staff training in August.
I’m excited about our new programs and even more
gratified that our we’re seeing greater utilization of our
Incident Response and Law Enforcement Outreach
Programs by members of the SM-leather-fetish, swing
and polyamory communities.”
MS WORLD LEATHER
The third annual Ms World Leather competition will be
held in Dallas TX on the weekend of August 8-10, 2003.
The event starts on Friday August 8 with the meet and
greet at The Dallas Eagle. The event continues on
Saturday with the beginning of the judging. Registrants
for the weekend will have the opportunity see all aspects
of the judging as the judges are seeing it. The weekend
culminates on Sunday with the main event taking place
on Sunday afternoon.
Registration for the weekend is $149 ($89 before June
30, $119 before Aug 1). The complete weekend package
includes Meet and Greet, demos and cocktail parties, MsWL
Reception/ Competitor Basket Auction, vendors, competitor
interviews, Crossfire (press portion of judging), Ms. World
Leather Competition, Victory Toast at the Dallas Eagle,
MsWL Sunday Brunch and .Pin. Registration and info:
The host hotel is the Radisson Hotel Dallas, 1893 West
Mockingbird Lane. A special weekend rate of $59 a night
will be given to individuals who mention Ms World Leather
when they are making their reservations.
Call (214) 634-8850.
Q & A OF THE WEEK
A. I am sure you do not remember me, we have
met a couple times, most recently at BR, and I am
interested to hear a bit more about the “coloring books”
you bought at IML, as I am currently waiting for my “little
girl” to move here with me, and as she was not able to
have coloring books as a child, she is more than interested
in having them now, and I want them to have that lovely,
kinky theme if at all possible. If you know where I can
get those, or any other source of coloring books for those
of a leather bent, I would appreciate it. If not, then
thanks for at least reading this.
Q. I don’t know if I would call this coloring book
“lovely, kinky” because it is tough, macho, homosexual,
extreme man meat (perfect for me). It’s called Book Two:
The Hun Coloring Book and it costs $20. It’s poster-sized
so you can take the staples out and hang up your work
when it’s finished. Or you can trace the work if you want
to keep the book pristine. You can do more than just color
with crayons (or pencils or markers), you can add air (or
delete it with whiteout), add tattoos, add clothing, lash
marks, etc. You can add dialogue.
The Hun has a website at http://www.hunart.com/ but
the website does not have his complete work on it and it
does not have this book. But write to him and he will
know what you are talking about. He’s a really nice guy.
Make sure you tell him you are over 21.
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an email, with background skills, to:
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926-269B Saturday July 26 – Libertine Ball V: A Midsummer
Mardi Gras Masquerade – Philadelphia’s sizzling summer
fantasy Ball. Join international performers, players,
deejays, dancers and dungeonmeisters for a fabulous
frolic though our HUGE new venue.18 to enter/ 21 to drink.
$20 thru 6/30, $30 7/21-25 or $40 @door. A portion of
the proceeds will provide seed money for the Diabolique
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of Elegant Provocative Latex Fashions for men and
women of all sizes. Providing a range of latex fashions
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Custom Couture, & Bizarre Rubber Creations for the
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on HBO. On line catalogue at www.Baroness.com For
appointments 212-529-5964. Wholesale and Retail.
Your ad could be here! Email me if you are interested.
EVENTS OF THE WEEK
Friday 6.27 NYC
Mother’s March Against AIDS. Assemble at Christopher
Street & Sheridan Square at 7pm. The March will proceed
down Christopher Street to West Street, for speeches, a
Multi faith Prayer service & a presentation by the “Lavender
Light Gospel Quire.” Candles will be provided at no Charge.
Bring a picture of someone you lost to AIDS. Free. Rain or shine.
Info: Lenny Waller (718)-367-7484 firstname.lastname@example.org or
Beverly Rotter (718)-934-1758 Bevrotter1@aol.com
Friday 6.27 NYC
DFS presents “The Japanese Diamond Bondage Workshop”
with SV, aka The Bondagor. Bring rope for this workshop
(25-75 feet will do). You will learn Japanese Diamond
Bondage techniques from start to finish; along with The
Bondagor’s erotic, “Leg Corset.” 7:45pm at Paddles, 250
W 26th St, between 7 & 8 Aves. $8 ($4 for DSF & affiliate
members). Info: www.DomSubFriends.com
Friday 6.27 Washington, DC
Crucible Open Play 9pm. $30; $20 for members of
Crucible and BDSM orgs, Free for TES Fest Volunteers
(wear your TES Fest staff shirt); $10 for TES Fest
presenters. Info: www.the-crucible.com
Saturday 6.28 NYC
NYC Female slave Forum: “Aging In A D/s or M/s
Relationship.” How does aging affect a D/s or M/s
relationship? What’s different about being a submissive/
slave at 25, 35, 45, 55, etc.? What about being a
Dominant/Master? It’s not just all about achy knees that
may make kneeling difficult or impossible — or the same for
having a strong arm with the flogger. How does the
rhythm of a relationship change with the aging of the
relationship and its partners? What happens if the
Dominant gets ill and the submissive must take the
dominant role? What happens if the submissive becomes
ill ? What if the Dominant leaves her? What happens if
your Master dies and the world see you as aging? What
happens after your grieving and you want to find another
M/s relationship? What happens when aging parents
need our help? How will that impact your M/s relationship?
2-4pm. RSVP for location. Info: 917-470-4738 or
Saturday 6.28 NYC
March with LSM in the Dyke March. Meet at 4:30pm at the
northern lion of the NYC Public Library, 41st St. Just to
clarify, the northern lion is the one that is on the right
when you are facing the library.
Sunday 6.29 NYC
Gay Pride March. This year, Leather/Levi/Fetish groups
are in Section 6. The assembly area for Section 6 is 56th
Street, between 5th and Madison Avenues. We start
lining up at 11:30am and step off at Noon, marching
down 5th Ave and (NEW) turning onto 8th Street and
ending at Chrstopher & Greenwich Sts. Moment of
silence is at 2pm.
This Monday and every Monday Cyberspace
Back by popular demand (maybe not so popular but
surely demanding…): The Eulenspiegel Not Til chat room
on AOL 10pm-Midnight. NOT a TES event but an unofficial
place online where many TES members and friends hang
out and talk. No set topic. It is a good place to ask
questions, debate the answers, ask and receive advice,
compare notes about the scene, gossip about last week,
plan the upcoming week, flirt a little, be serious and not
so serious. On AOL in the Town Square area of the
People Connection in a “member room” – not private:
aol://2719:61-2-Eulenspiegel not til. Add this location
to your Favorite Places Folder so that it’s easy to come
Tuesday 7.1 NYC
TES Meeting: “DS without SM” with Master Stephen and
slave catherine. Is S&M a defining element of D/s
relationships? Do other forms of Dominance and
submission bring an equal degree of satisfaction? Are
these forms mutually exclusive? Sir Stephen and slave
catherine discuss the use of the Service Model in
structuring and maintaining their D/s Household. The
discussion will cover a range of topics including how this
structure evolved for Sir Stephen and slave catherine,
historical perspectives, creating the space for service,
identifying service needs and equipping the servant to
fulfill them, etc. 7:30pm at 75 Bleecker St, just east of
Broadway. $8 ($4 for members of TES and other
SM/leather orgs). Info: 212-388-7022 or www.tes.org
Wednesday 7.2 NYC
TES Singles Group presents “Tit Play” with Master Jim.
$8 ($4 for members of TES and other SM/leather orgs).
Info: 212-388-7022 or www.tes.org
LINKS OF THE WEEK
Sometimes we need things like this:
Have fun! Play safe!
Lolita speaking only for Lolita, of course!