Lolita Wolf's Predictions & Predilections

As a BDSM Sex Educator and Author, I don't just talk about it. I do it! And then I write about it.

Lolita Wolf's Predictions & Predilections header image 2

LOLITA’S PREDICTIONS & PREDILECTIONS – November 19, 2004

November 20th, 2004 · No Comments

Volume 10, Number 24 © Copyright 2004 by Lolita Wolf – Material may not be reproduced in whole or in part without prior written consent of the copyright holder. The views expressed herein are exclusively those of the author and do not represent the views of any other person or any organization with which the author may be associated.

.
<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:
QUOTATION OF THE WEEK

“Imagination is more important than knowledge.”

– Albert Einstein

.
< >:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:
LEATHERFEST WEEK

I started my week with a trip out to Huntington to present my poly class at the Long Island Leather N Roses group. This is a very nice group of people who meet every Tuesday night. (See http://www.lilnr.org)

And then, it was bondage, bondage, bondage. On Wednesday November 10, I went to Midori’s Predicament Bondage workshop hosted by GMSMA. Every fall during Leatherfest week, both GMSMA and LSM open their meetings to all genders. Midori was educational and entertaining as usual. On Thursday, I rushed over to the Barbara Nitke opening. Her new work is absolutely magnificent. I just love the color work – it pops! LSM had their open meeting with Midori doing ” Hands-On Hand and Foot Bondage. I learned a bunch of tricks and tied up Michael’s hands in a prayer position. It immediately relaxed him and he was happy. On Friday night, AJ and I schlepped up to Newburgh to see Bridgett’s Asymmetrical Bondage class. This was also supposed to be hands-on but the space was very cold. I tied AJ to her chair while she was wearing her leather jacket.

On Saturday it was GMSMA Leatherfest at the Center. This is the biggest bargain in the scene at $10 for 5 classes, an art show and a vendor mart. I spent most of my time at the NCSF table selling raffle tickets for the Harley-Davidson. The rest of the time I taught a class and spent 10 minutes giving the art fair a cursory tour. Later that night LSM met up with the Butch Femme Group for Dinner at Café Buon Gusto. Afterwards we headed over to Paddles and caned AJ until she had nice big bruises.

On Sunday, it was Dim Sum in Chinatown and Rachel Kramer Bussell’s book signing at Suede. I flirted with lots of hot girls, had a free Cosmopolitan, ate a cupcake, bought Rachel’s spanking new book on spanking and AJ got spanked (but not hard enough!).

.
<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:
STALKERBOY’S BIRTHDAY

By aj stalkerboy

This is it, my last birthday in my 30’s. I am not all that happy about it despite my very young 20’s something co-workers telling me not to worry because “40 is the new 30, AJ”. I figured I should do something fun, So I called Lolita and invited myself to New York. Lolita said yes, so off I went.

Here is a quick run down of what we did. And we did do a lot.

On Friday night we went to a bondage workshop somewhere in New York. I don’t know where. It was really great except the room was freezing. Lolita tied me up over my leather jacket while my hands were in my pockets.

Saturday was GMSMA’s Leatherfest. That was a lot of fun as I got to be a demo bottom for Lolita’s sensory deprivation class. I was in my hood and my hands were covered. I fell asleep. I also got to be one of the demo bottoms for Jo Arnone’s flogging class. Saturday night was dinner and Paddles. Lolita caned me. Well, no, that doesn’t sound quite right. Lolita beat the shit out of me. And no, that is not a complaint. I still have the bruises and I am quite happy about it.

Sunday was Dim Sum. Now that was fun! Lolita and I met up with Boymeat, Luna, and Badfaggot. We ate a lot of food. Afterward we walked through Chinatown and other neighborhoods. At the end of the day Lolita and I went for manicures and pedicures. I got clear on my on my fingers and I got nightlife blue on my toes and had them do a topcoat with silver glitter polish. It looks way too cool. If you are wondering if this makes me less of a boy, no it doesn’t as I am pretty secure about myself and my boyness.

That’s a wrap up of what we did. But me being me, I also need to write about what I learned. I learned that I am a control freak. It is really hard for me to let go. It is so easy to bottom and say “Okay, you just be in charge” when the circumstances fit. What I learned is that it is really easy for me to submit when I actually feel like I can control something. Usually the hotel room or making sure Lolita gets to a class on time. In those circumstances I have a lot of information. I am in charge of something. When I don’t have information, I resist letting go and trusting that everything is cool. What I learned is that if I am going to write a contract, if I am going to wear Lolita’s collar, I also need to be open and trusting when there is no room to manage and no class to get to.

I have been bottoming to Lolita on various levels for over four years. In those fours years I have learned through our friendship and various aspects of D/s or play, that Lolita would never withhold information that would hurt me. Her ability to Top me as a play partner, to be Dominant to my submissive self and her friendship is a huge gift. She never falls short. I on the other hand fall short. I feel that I carry my weight in the friendship, and God knows I love to play but I feel like still have a lot to learn about completely letting go. I am so grateful that Lolita is patient while I figure these things out. I have a lot of commitments and goals for the up coming year. One of them is letting go and truly submitting to Lolita and not just paying lip service to the concept.

Lolita, thank you for another great birthday and for your continued friendship and support.

**** Thanks to AJ for sharing this report. …And Happy Birthday! ****

.
:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>
FEMALE SEXUALITY SURVEY CONDUCTED BY IPG

Many people in the scene are familiar with Dr Margie Nichols of IPG, a counseling and psychotherapy center that focuses its advertising to the LGBT and alternative lifestyle communities. IPG has created a survey to learn more about women’s sexuality. Wanting to have something to compare the results to, they asked women of all identities to fill out the survey. So far, they have gotten about 800 responses. Two papers have already been written based on the results and at least one other paper is planned and hopefully, the findings will be presented at conferences. The more women who fill out the survey, the better the findings will be. They are looking for women of all sorts. It is totally anonymous and takes about 10-15 minutes. http://www.ipgcounseling.com/survey.html

An equivalent survey for men is being developed and should be ready sometime in January.

.
<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>
THE WANT ADS

Thanks to my sponsors!

1052-255Y SINGLETAILS IN THE SCENE, a NEW 2 hour instructional video is now available. Learn basic & advanced throws. Learn how to practice. Learn how to use a signal whip on someone from light & sensual to heavy & intense. Includes four actual scenes. Only $35.00 + shipping & handling. http://www.SingletailsInTheScene.com

1031-273Y Dr. Vittoria Repetto – Chiropractor / Applied Kinesiologist / Nutritional Consultation. Dedicated to providing my patients with the holistic therapies and the personalized education they need to regain and maintain their optimal health. 285 West B’way @ Canal St., NYC 212 – 431 – 3724 http://www.drvittoriarepetto.meta-ehealth.com/ DrVittoriaRepett@aol.com Best Doctor – Best of Gay New York – NYBlade, Oct, 17, 03.

1034-278Y Purple Passion / DV8 has one of the largest selections of corsets, leather, latex & PVC clothing for men and women. Custom corsets, clothing and harnesses. Artwork for sale: our current show started Nov 13 2004. Gallery Hours: Thurs, Fri & Sat 4-7pm or by appointment. Store hours: Mon, Tues, Wed noon-7pm, Thurs & Fri Noon-9pm, Sat Noon-8pm Sun Noon-6pm. 211 W 20 St, NYC. Tel 212-807-0486, For online shopping, workshop & art show schedules http://www.purplepassion.com/

1032-283H The Baroness, designer of Elegant, Provocative Latex Fashions. The Fetish Retinue returns with a guaranteed crowd pleaser (teaser): Feet! A sensuous evening devoted to appreciation, wonder and worship of feet, adorned in sexy stiletto heels, high boots, nylon stockings and, in their naked glory! Sunday October 3, from 8-2 performances start at 10:00, at The Alphabet Lounge, corner of Avenue C & 7th Street NYC. 212 529 5964 or visit www.Baroness.com

1024-286B READY FOR A GETAWAY? La Domaine Esemar, the oldest SM training chateau in the US, welcomes couples and individuals who would like to use our facilities. La Domaine offers the privacy you want and the attention you deserve; with slaves to serve, fine dining, and a splendid dungeon. For more information, call: 518-781-6209, 10-7 est, m-f. http://www.ladomaineesemar.com/

1025-297B New Years weekend? The Crucible’s: Friday: standard kick ass New Year’s Eve party. Saturday: All day and night activities culminating with “Puttin’ on the Ritz” a formal/fetish dinner and dance w/ live music. www.the-crucible.com

1025-280B November 19 9pm – 2am BANG 4 THE BUCK WOMEN’S HARD CORE SEX & PLAY PARTY AIDS LIFECYCLE FUNDRAISER HOSTED BY MIDORI & KELLY B. What better way to celebrate life and fight HIV/AIDS than to enjoy steamy safer sex and nasty fun play with the hottest women of the Bay Area? The Citadel,245 8th Street, San Francisco, CA 94103. $15 – $20. Any extra donations to ALC happily accepted! RSVP & volunteer offer to hear2u@hotmail.com

1025-281B Alternative Leather Business for Sale: established for 14 years, brick and mortar and .com. Very desirable registered trademark and .com name in field, and huge beautiful site. Private label with international following. Large inventory, diverse product offering. 917-887-4650 GabbyA1@att.net

1027-282B Feisty, loyal, sensual, sensitive femme bottom with a silly and sharp sense of humor desires a faithful, passionate butch who knows how to treat a lady in and out of the bedroom 😉 Political and creative are a plus. I know how to love a butch and make him feel it deep down in hys ummmmmm toes. I’m 5’6″ – a large-sized, full-figured, curvy chick! You can reach me at NYFemmeGrrl@yahoo.com

Your ad could be here! Email me if you are interested.

.
:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>
LINK OF THE WEEK

The end of an era, and perhaps something new is waiting in the wings:
http://lthredge.com/

Have fun! Play safe!
Lolita Wolf

Lolita speaking only for Lolita, of course!
http://www.LeatherYenta.com

.
:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>:<>
Part One of One
Copyright 2004 Lolita Wolf

Tags: P+P Newsletter