Lolita Wolf's Predictions & Predilections

Boymeat and I were co-topping a girl in the dungeon at BR2006. We were happy and playing together nicely. This girl was happy getting the shit caned out of her. The Dungeon Monitors were happy that we were not breaking the rules or doing anything crazy. Everything was just perfect.

Well, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Santa across the dungeon. And he was heading right towards us! He was wearing a traditional Santa hat and a white button-down shirt with a red leather vest. The backpatch on the vest was his “colors” appliquéd in white bearing his picture and his name: Santa. He wore matching red leather pants with white fur trim and big black engineer boots. He was carrying a big wooden paddle. I just knew this would be trouble.

Santa got right up into Boymeat’s face. “Do you believe in Santa?”
“No.” Thwack! “Ow!”
“Do you believe in Santa?”
“No, I’m Jewish.” Thwack! “Ow!”
“Do you believe in Santa?”
“Yes.” Thwack! “Ow!”

Santa ran around the table to me. “What cookies did you leave for Santa?”
“Chocolate chip.” Thwack! “Ow!”
“What cookies did you leave for Santa?”
“Ginger snap?” Thwack! “Ow!”
“Liar!”
“Oreos, and I’m sorry they were store- bought.” Thwack! “Ow!”
“You didn’t leave any cookies for Santa.”
“I’m sorry!”
Thwack! “Ow!”

Santa ran around back to Boymeat. “Have you been naughty or nice?”
“Nice.” Thwack! “Ow!”
“Have you been naughty or nice?”
“Nice.” Thwack! “Ow!”
“Have you been naughty or nice?”
“Naughty.” Thwack! “Ow!”
There did not seem to be any answer that would please Santa.

Santa then ran off. We’re not sure where. Just that he disappeared into the crowded dungeon. You know, it’s always the Jews that get persecuted.

Now, some of you think that this is just some far-fetched story that Lolita made up, but, it’s really true. It did happen. Santa even sent me a Christmas card!