Lolita Wolf's Predictions & Predilections

As a BDSM Sex Educator and Author, I don't just talk about it. I do it! And then I write about it.

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March 27th, 2003 · No Comments


Volume 9, Number 13 © Copyright 2003 by Lolita Wolf – Material may not be reproduced in whole or in part without prior written consent of the copyright holder. The views expressed herein are exclusively those of the author and do not represent the views of any other person or any organization with which the author may be associated.



“I think the best we can do is to assume that the right approaches will be the ones that emerge by courageously facing some realities squarely and honestly, without being influenced by personal agendas, needing to paint a rosy picture of things, or needing to be ‘politically correct.’”

– Guy Baldwin



The origins of Lolita’s Predictions & Predilections began back in 1995. This has always been the way I stay in contact with my friends. It is the weekly update to what is happening in my life, what I think is important in the SM scene and a planning tool for the coming week. The P+P has evolved into more than a way to stay in touch with my circle of friends and it now reaches thousands of readers per week.

For the past five years, Joe Gallagher has hosted the web version of the P+P. Joe’s site,, has been a tremendous resource to the community, providing a space where many leather columnists could be read. I have been very fortunate to be included.

On more than occasion, Joe and I have had editorial disagreements about the content of my column. I have always been very clear that these views are my own (see the disclaimer above). I want to state my opinions freely. After much soul-searching, I have come to the conclusion that I must pull the P+P from

Thank you very much to Joe for hosting the P+P. It can now be seen on the web at …and of course, you can still subscribe to it via email (



I went out to Bond Con in Queens for the day on Friday. What a culture shock! The main focus was in the exhibit hall with the various bondage models being the center of attraction. There were all types of girls (and one guy – Delano) and they really knew how to work the crowds of “fan boys.” The models flirted and made arrangements to be tied up by riggers who wanted to show off their tie-up skills. The fan-boys, mainly single men (or men without their wives), stood around and watched. Many had cameras and clicked away. They were oddly reminiscent of Hellfire’s wankers, but these guys had their clothes on and did not touch themselves.

I hung out with Midori and Michael Blue and offered to perform small acts of service. The two of them have teamed up to do a fabulous bondage website ( Midori had a bondage frame with her and suspended three different models during the time I was there. She would look at them, study their bodies and ask them questions about their level of experience and then just go to work. She took extra care with a model who had never been suspended before. Once the models were up, she would add some rope and loosen others and the suspension would morph into a whole other position. Midori is very fluid.

I saw a bunch of people I know. Saw Lady J whom I hadn’t seen in years and she looked great. The guys from Stationhouse were there and they had cute camouflage swimsuits for women ( Also saw Leather By Danny, Rainbow Rope, Details and others.



M Blair presented at Lesbian Sex Mafia on Friday night. She taught all the safety aspects and techniques of Cutting and then did a demo which turned out beautifully. I really like the way she teaches – she is very organized and complete.

After a bite to eat with other LSM folks, I headed over to meet up with Boymeat and Neptune at the LURE. The LURE was packed! It seems everyone who came into NYC for the Black Party and Night of 1000 Gowns and showed up at the LURE. We got to see a bunch of people and catch up with them. It was also a big night for Neptune. Friday was the last day of his slave contract and the beginning of slave vacation. How is it that he always ends up uncollared at the LURE during slave vacation? That drives me nuts. He’s too cute to be loose at the LURE. At Midnight it was also Neptune’s birthday. He is now 25, which is a great age because that is when your car insurance rates go down. To celebrate, he smoked cigars with Boymeat.

On Saturday night, I met up with Boymeat at Paddles. There was also a huge crowd there with many from Bond Con and I had to wait in a line outside to get in. It was tough finding a spot to play, but we finally did, and I beat the crap out of him. Floggers. Unrestrained. He would yell in a primal way and jump up and down. I felt very strong and I hit him very hard. A few times he sank to one knee, “Get up! I’m not done.” He would get up and we would keep going. Finally, he collapsed on the floor sobbing. Oh, yeah.

On Sunday, I work Neptune up early (1pm) and dragged him out to the TES Party, held at Nutcracker Suite. TES has not played at the Nut in over a year and much of the place has been renovated. It looked really beautiful. In celebration of his birthday, I allowed him to pick the scene and he chose bondage. I took my prettiest rope and laid down a harness and then layered more over his arms and legs. The colors wove in and he giggled, remembering our first date four years ago when I tied him up at Hellfire, “I seem to always inspire you to break symmetry.” I chose some vet wrap that color-coordinated with the rope and wrapped his head. I added bungie cords so that he could bounce. We were in the medical room where I turned off the white lights and kept the blue lights on low. It looked really pretty. I need to get more bungie cords.



Slave Trade by Susan Wright, Book 1 of the Slave Trade Trilogy, published by Pocket Books will be released in April 2003.

Slave Trade is a provocative new science fiction saga of slavery and rebellion. Human slaves can’t defy their alien masters – or can they? Rose Rico never believed the rumors, that the government was secretly selling human beings to the Alphas in exchange for advanced alien technology. The idea that human sex slaves were a luxury item throughout the galaxy was just too ridiculous to take seriously–until Rose found herself, along with hundreds of other human captives, bound for the far reaches of space, and compelled to cater to the depraved desires of her new alien masters. As a rule, pleasure slaves don’t live very long, especially the stubborn ones. But Rose refuses to give up. Someday, somehow, she’ll win back her freedom-or die trying!

Susan Wright writes nonfiction books on art and popular culture, including SM Classics and Destination Mars, and is also the author of nine Star Trek novels, including Dark Passions 1 & 2, Gateways: One Small Step, Badlands, and Sins of Commission. Susan is the Spokesperson for the National Coalition for Seuxal Freedom (NCSF), a national organization that supports the rights of consenting adults in the SM-leather-fetish, swing, and polyamory communities. Info:



Long time readers will remember me posting occasionally about my friend, Pat McCarty of New Orleans. About 4 years ago Pat was diagnosed with a rare form of carcinoid cancer. It is a slow growing type of cancer. Over the past few years he has taken chemo and radiation treatments and takes daily doses of medication for the cancer. Two weeks ago he took a turn for the worse. This type of cancer causes numerous tumors and the tumors have now infiltrated his spinal cord. They did emergency surgery 2 weeks ago to remove one of the tumors that was pressing on his spinal cord. At this point he is still in the hospital and is undergoing rehab. He is wheelchair bound and unable to walk or stand by himself due to paralysis from the tumors on his spinal cord. They have hope that he will get some movement back in his legs…how much they are unsure of since almost every vertebrae in his spine has these tumors. He starts radiation tomorrow to see if they can shrink the tumors.

Pat needs the support and prayers of the community. He does not have email access right now and probably won’t have it for the next couple of months. If anyone wants to contact him they can do so via his long time fiend, Kristil Thompson at



In mid May, New York City’s Fetish and BDSM communities are uniting to present The NYC Fetish Marathon. This four-day non-stop festival of alternative sexuality will be anchored by both The Black & Blue Ball X, kicking things off on Thursday, May 15, and The Eulenspiegel Society’s 3 day kink extravaganza TES FEST, May 16 – 18. Many events, both large and small, will be happening all over the city during the weekend including around-the-clock dungeon access to NYC’s most famous public dungeon, Paddles until the wee hours of Monday morning.

The Eulenspiegel Society, 2003 winner of Pantheon of Leather’s Large Club of the Year Award, will host TES Fest at The Hotel Pennsylvania. The hotel, one of the five largest in the City, is located at 7th

Avenue at 33rd Street, in the heart of midtown and directly opposite Madison Square Garden and Amtrak’s Penn Station so it is the single easiest hotel to get to and find in all of Manhattan. Macy’s, the world’s largest

department store, is one block up the street. The Empire State building is around the corner. The Theater District is a few blocks away. Prices for TES Fest go up April 1. Info: and



Beloved American Leatherboy 2001, Bryan “Pup” Mullikin departed this life Thursday March 13 at his home in Chicago. He was 33 years old. Pup graced the Washington, DC leather community from 1999 until his May 2002 move to the Windy City. He had lived in New York and San Francisco prior to the Nation’s Capital. He was no stranger to the Leather Community across the country, he will always be known for his warm smile and effervescent personality.

He proudly served as President of the DC Boys of Leather for two years. He worked hard to help boys’ clubs across the country. It was his personal mission to impress upon the community the importance of respect for all individuals including his fellow boys.

Pup is survived by his mother and father of Northern Kentucky. He was their only child. Burial will be held in his family’s hometown. Brian’s family is in need of assistance with the burial arrangements, and several people and clubs have already made generous donations. The DC Boys of Leather have volunteered to collect donations on behalf of the community and forward them on to the family. Make checks payable to DC Boys of Leather, write “Bryan” in the memo line, and sent by mail to: DC Boys of Leather, Attn: Bryan Mullikin Memorial, PO Box 53286, Washington, DC 20009. Donations may also be made by PayPal to and enter the subject as “Bryan Mullikin”



The Great Lakes Leather Alliance is producing its second annual GLLA Weekend the weekend of August 22-24 in Indianapolis, IN. This pansexual weekend will include five regional leather competitions: Great Lakes Leather Sir, Great Lakes Leather boy, Great Lakes Ms. Leather Pride, Great Lakes Boot Black, and Great Lakes Master/slave. The weekend will also encompass a large and well-equipped play-space, some gender specific furnished play-spaces, a vendors market, a hospitality suite, an ‘Exit to Eden’ Master/Mistress/slave auction for charity, kinky entertainment, nearly thirty educational workshops and demos and many well-known speakers, judges, and presenters.

The host hotel offers a special rate of only $51. The location of the host hotel will be given only to

registered attendees of the event, and all attendees musy register in advance because no packages will be sold on premises. Register before May 1 for the early-bird rate of $60. Info:



Thanks to my sponsors!

924-215Y Dr. Vittoria Repetto, 285 West B’way #530, NYC 10013, 212-431-3724, Dedicated to providing my patients with the holistic therapies and personalized education they need to regain and maintain their optimal health. I respect all consensual choices. One of the Top Ten NYC Chiropractors: New Life Magazine, Sept 2001.

925-218Y Purple Passion / DV8, we have one of the largest selections of corsets, leather, latex & PVC clothing for men and women. We do custom corsets, clothing and harnesses. Our current featured artists are Ira Smith and Coyote. Hours: Wed Noon-7pm, Thurs & Fri Noon-9pm, Sat Noon-8pm Sun Noon-7pm. Mon & Tues Noon-7pm. 211 West 20th Street. Tel 212-807-0486,

946-255Y SINGLETAILS IN THE SCENE, a NEW 2 hour instructional video is now available. Learn basic & advanced throws. Learn how to practice. Learn how to use a signal whip on someone from light & sensual to heavy & intense. Includes four actual scenes. Only $35.00 + shipping & handling.

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919-258BB Fetish and/or Pantyhose Models wanted for website, (females & transsexuals only). No experience necessary, however, must be comfortable posing in bondage shots,and also some with Mistress Spikes. If you are a size 10 or under and want to earn $50.00 an hour, then call me at: 631-754-4963, or email: Long Island location. If you are within the boroughs, I will reimburse L.I. railroad fee. Website:

953- 260T Digital Kinbaku Ancient Art meets Fine Art

Combining the ancient art of kinbaku / shibari & the futuristic art of digital fine art photography. A journey of two artists on an exploration into the world of Japanese rope bondage with a twist. Beautiful female & male models in beautiful hemp rope.

1006-261Y KINK-SENSITIVE PSYCHOTHERAPY: IPG Counseling; 20 yrs. of caring for L/G/B/T, BDSM & Poly communities. Offices in Highland Park, Freehold and Jersey City, NJ. 24 therapists on staff. Dr. Margaret Nichols, Director. Call (800) 379-9220/

932-262H Ms Mir, Certified Massage Therapist – Spiritual Hands, “Synchronize Your Body With Your Soul.” Serene and private, a revitalize touch of Swedish, Foot Reflexology, Hot Stone Massage, Deep Tissue – Neuromuscular & Japanese Anma Massage. Gift certificates available & home visits if necessary. Appointment only – weekend & evenings available. Teaneck, NJ (5) minutes from the George Wash. Bridge. 201 280-1976 or Brochure available upon request w/ introductory offer.

914-262AA Private Play Party Hosted by Sir Barry. When: Saturday April 5th 10pm-3am. Where: Arena Blaze Dungeon 12 East 32nd St. 7th Fl. Cost: Couples: $50, Single Men: $40, Single Women $15. Complimentary beverages and snacks, Dom/Domme & Slave Auction at midnight. For more info please write to Sir Barry at or call (718) 937-1836

953-263Z Active NYC scene participant is in search of new living quarters in Manhattan or Brooklyn with easy access to downtown Manhattan. 26, bi-male, fully employed and responsible looking for an apartment either alone or with kink-friendly roommate(s) for $600/mo. Please e-mail if you think you can help! Thank you!

Your ad could be here! Email me if you are interested.



Friday 3.28 NYC

DomSubFriends Meeting: “Passionate duo whips: Part 2” with Eric & jan and Special Guest

Joe Wheeler. 8pm at Paddles, 250 W 26 St between 7 & 8th Aves. $8 (4 for members of DSF & affiliate members). Info:

Saturday 3.29 NYC

TES Meeting: “Extreme Scenes…. Hard Play” with Bo (aka Master J) and Lady D. Ever wanted to play really hard? Or do that really intense scene? Discuss and demo. 7:30-10pm at The Paddles, 250 W 26 St, between 7 & 8 Aves. $8 ($4 for members of TES and other leather/SM orgs) Info: 212-388-7022 or

This Monday and every Monday Cyberspace

Back by popular demand (maybe not so popular but surely demanding…): The Eulenspiegel Not Til chat room on AOL 10pm-Midnight. NOT a TES event but an unofficial place online where many TES members and friends hang out and talk. No set topic. It is a good place to ask questions, debate the answers, ask and receive advice, compare notes about the scene, gossip about last week, plan the upcoming week, flirt a little, be serious and not so serious. On AOL in the Town Square area of the People Connection in a “member room” – not private: aol://2719:61-2-Eulenspiegel not til. Add this location to your Favorite Places Folder so that it’s easy to come back.

Tuesday 4.1 NYC

TES presents “Hypnosis In the Scene” with Jonathan Vale. 7:30pm at 75 Bleecker St, just east of Broadway. $8 ($4 for members of TES and other SM/leather orgs). Info: 212-388-7022 or

Wednesday 4.2 NYC

TES Dominant Men/submissive women’s Group presents “Sinle Tail Whips” with Eric & jan and Special Guest Joe Wheeler. 7:30pm at 75 Bleecker St, just east of Broadway. $8 ($4 for members of TES and other SM/leather orgs). Info: 212-388-7022 or



Binding arbitration yields $35,000 for bondage case:

Alden Baker, who faced civil commitment for interest in S&M, was ruled not dangerous and released:

Have fun! Play safe!

Lolita Wolf

Lolita speaking only for Lolita, of course!

Tags: P+P Newsletter

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