Back in July I wrote about the new collar for Don Quixote which we have dubbed “The Collar of Complication.” I’ve wanted to post a clean version of it. It’s made of rings that are gunmetal in color, except for one ring that is gold. Most people don’t notice the “mistake,” but we know it’s there and we asked for it to be put in there.

We were inspired by the Islamic tapestries we saw at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Apparently Islamic artists make a deliberate error in their work because they believe only God is perfect. The collar has nothing to do with God, but it does represent that our relationship is not perfect.

Celebrating the imperfection of our relationship sure does take a lot of pressure off us.

Don Quixote is wearing my collar. It’s not a slave collar. Nope! And it’s not a training collar. That’s not right either. It certainly ain’t the collar of consideration. Huh! And it sure as hell is not a collar of protection. Puh-lease!

We finally agreed that this is the collar of complication. And that seems about perfect for us.

And it does clean up nicely.

It was a Sunday, I locked Don Quixote into the chastity device. We would not see each other again until Friday. He didn’t complain. He knew that I had the right to control him in that way.

He did, however, mention that he had a date. One of those kinds of dates. A date for sex. He was letting me know that perhaps I might not think this was an optimal time for him to be locked up. I thought about it. Did I really want to ruin his sex date? I wasn’t really worried about DQ, but I did want to be considerate to his date. I want to be a good poly partner.

I did not have to think about it too long. “Some of the best sex we’ve had did not involve your cock. I think your date will be just fine.” I kissed him good-bye, “Have fun! See you Friday!”

I will be presenting a workshop about how to have more successful poly relationships at 9:30pm and open play will be available all evening long in one of the country’s finest play spaces.

The Workshop:
The Greedy Pig Deals with Issues
Make your poly relationships work for everybody involved. Learn strategies to implement relationship agreements and boundaries. We’ll work with issues such as time, space, sex drives and more. Design the relationship structure to fit your needs. Some pitfalls are obvious, and some you would never imagine.

Event Details:
Admission to this event is $20 or only $15 with a current membership card from Baltimore TNG and/or Friends of Play House. Please bring a dish to share for the food table. Soft drinks and bottled water are available for purchase at the club. And because this is a PRIVATE EVENT, you may BYOB.

Parking is available in an attached parking garage for $5 per car – please arrive before 10:30pm if you want to park inside.

To ensure that this play party is considered a PRIVATE EVENT you MUST RSVP, even if we know you. Please email glendaCPFA@aol.com to RSVP. The address of the event & directions will be sent to you when you RSVP. Please RSVP early as only the first 75 people to RSVP will be able to attend. You may also call Glenda for more info between noon and midnight EDT @ 410 963 0567 but please RSVP via email. Play House can only offer sex positive events if EVERYONE RSVPs to make it a PRIVATE event – so just do it – you know you don’t want to miss the FUN!!!!!

The photo of me was taken Saturday night by Nayland Blake.

The audience at Cinekink sang Happy Birthday to me.

Mollena Williams wrote an awesome tribute for my birthday.

And Cindy composed a poem -

Our Lolita
When ya meet’ha
She might just beatcha
Or maybe teach ya

In the world of leather yenta
Sex toys maybe that she lent ya
In your butthole you can clench, “Aaaa!”
“That is what I meant, Yaaaahh!”

Happy birthday, dear Lolita!

And thanks to everyone who called, emailed, tweeted, etc.

Don Quixote and I ate dinner at the Empire Diner with an old friend of his. I had the grilled salmon, he had the chili and the friend had guacamole. The waiter had the same snotty attitude that most Empire Diner waiters throughout time seem to have. But the food was good and the conversation was lively.

Both the chili and the guacamole were served with chips. As DQ picked up the last chip on his plate, I took it from him, “I want your last chip,” I announced and bit into the crunchy goodness.

The friend had many chips left on her plate and offered me some of hers. “No, thank you, I just wanted his last chip.”

She then offered her chips to DQ. I waited to see if he would accept her offer. He didn’t think about it too long. “No, thanks,” he said.

He’s so smart. He knew I wanted his last chip.

I received this question through my website from a person who left a bad email address. It’s such a typical question that I thought I would answer it here.

Q. Years ago I was introduced to some very basic BDSM by an older female lover. In that relationship I was always dominant. After we broke up I didn’t pursue it any further. Now in my 40′s, I really want to learn more and practice BDSM with an experienced person. I plan on joining a BDSM group soon. I would like to work on both dominance and submission which I guess makes me a switch. But how do you approach a more experienced person in the lifestyle to let her know you would like her for a play partner and want to benefit from her greater experience while at the same time wanting to bring something to the table for her, despite the lack of experience? Are Dommes especially often looking for Newbies to train? Does the same apply to experienced subs looking for new masters?

A. Frankly most women want relationships with a person they like.  Their partner’s BDSM experience is not the biggest factor.  I know that I first look for someone who is personable, smart, considerate and fun.  If they have those qualities, then I am most inclined to want to play with them.

“You’re in charge of the music,” I told Don Quixote. I was driving home from our New Year’s weekend and DQ was riding shotgun. We were listening to the radio.

I like to delegate. Sometimes it’s stuff I don’t want to do, but usually it’s stuff that the other person does better than me.  And DQ is very good with the music.

Forty-five minutes into the ride, Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance came on. “You’re in charge of music – except when Lady Gaga comes on, don’t touch the dial!”  I love Lady Gaga.

An hour later, the song comes on again. I was a bit surprised. “I should not touch the dial when Lady Gaga comes on,” DQ said in a way to remind himself as much as to remind me.

“That’s right. I love Lady Gaga!”

Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!
Roma-Roma-ma-ah!
Ga-ga-ooh-la-la!
Want your bad romance

Jack was a picky eater.  He didn’t eat a lot of veggies or fruits. He was a meat and potatoes kind of guy.

One weekend, I brought my girlfriend, O, with me to visit Jack. O is a pretty good cook.  I told her about Jack’s dietary preferences and she made us a fine meal of chicken and dumplings, something that Jack certainly would enjoy.

She set the table and served the food.  I took one bite and bellowed,”This is slop! Get me a cane.”

O dashed off to find a cane.  Jack sat and quietly ate his food while I waited. He did not look up.

When O returned, she handed me the cane and bent over the chair. I took a full stroke.  The cane swished through the air and landed on her butt cheeks. There was silence at the table.  I took another full swing and the cane landed again, an inch lower than the first.

I could sense that Jack was uncomfortable, but I ignored him.  I had to do what I had to do.  The cane landed four more times.  O’s butt was striped with red lines all in a row.  I stopped at six strokes.  I did not want dinner to get cold.

O and I sat back down and returned to eating our dinner.  Jack squirmed in his seat. In a small voice, he asked, “That was role play, wasn’t it?”

O and I laughed and assured him that it indeed was role play. Jack was visibly relieved and said, “Because this is really good food.”

Nayland, Thor and mudcub

Sharrin and pat

Boymeat and Kathryn

Our family dinner at the fabulous Art and Soul restaurant.